I am not a Democrat. I can’t stand the hypocrisy or the partisanship of either party, so I prefer to stay out of politics. But sometimes, the Republican Party creates a candidate so unlikeable, that I have to reluctantly get into politics. That candidate is Mitt Romney, and that time is now: Election 2012.
Once upon a time, Republicans were rational, logical and were able to converse with Democrats. People like Ronald Reagan, and whoever was in Congress during Bill Clinton’s presidency were able to work towards the good of the country, rather than the good of the party. That time is long gone. 2012 is a time of Tea Party Republicans - radically conservative bullies who attack social programs and blame Obama for the economy that was handed to him by his predecessor. Unfortunately, Romney is just a pawn in the game of Republicans taking over the White House. And as brilliant as he is in business, Romney is not a good politician.
First of all, where are the rest of your tax returns? I don’t understand how a man who is trying to gain the trust of a nation that he wants to lead keeps hiding. He’s hiding the one thing everyone wants to know. Is our potential future president paying his dues like the rest of the hardworking Americans, or is he stashing his millions in the Cayman Islands? It’s probably the latter, which is a smart move to make if you’re a businessman and a not-so-smart move if you’re trying to convince the public that you will fix the economy and bring back jobs (and investors) to the United States.
Another dumb-ass move courtesy of Mitt Romney is dealing with foreign matters. Obama is naturally charismatic and likeable, and has an equally-cognizant personality abroad. Mitt Romney has screwed his reputation by failing to hide his elitist, arrogant personality from world leaders he’s supposed to ingratiate. Insulting the conservative prime minister of England, even though England is one of our closest allies, is a testament to how unaware, and idiotic this man is. Even when national tragedy hits, and the US ambassador to Libya is murdered, Mitt Romney launches a cheap political attack to further divide the country. And dividing this country into bitter sides is this man’s forte.
It’s rare that the public gets to see true-to-form Romney, rather than a flip-flopper and the most important puppet of the conservative GOP. Fortunately, we recently got to hear his honesty, his raw opinion on the “little people.” While Romney was pandering to his wealthiest fat-cat supporters, it was revealed that Romney believed 47% of people were lazy, tax-evading, welfare-lovers; it was also revealed that Romney doesn’t care for those people. What a surprise. Rather than looking out for the best interests of this entire nation, he only seems to care about his supporters. He clearly cares very little for the retired citizens who make less in a year than he spends on one vacation. Or the unemployed, desperate Americans who can’t afford to live without Medicare or Food Stamps. Yes, those people are the lazy and entitled ones. Tax benefits and student benefits provide the poor with the ability to receive an education and move up the social ranks, while Mitt Romney wants them to stay poor.
Romney’s P90X-loving VP also wants the poor to stay poor, but we won’t talk about that here. Instead we’ll discuss his abhorrent views on abortion and his complete lack of respect for a woman’s choice. Paul Ryan once wrote an essay on abortion, and let me tell you, it’s as good as it sounds. Ryan considers a fertilized egg a human being, therefore potentially criminalizing some forms of birth control. He also believes all abortion should be banned, even in cases of rape, or in cases where the mother’s life is endangered. What a stand-up guy. You can tell he lets his wife make a lot of decisions. Congratulations Romney, you’ve managed to find someone more out-of-touch than you!
So Mitt Romney, please go deep into the night and hide in the comfort of your millions. You can go back to what you know best: finding tax loopholes, outsourcing jobs and investing in the American workers. Oops, did I say American? I meant Chinese. Because God knows, you do not know how to carry this country.
So I recently got a job at a New Brunswick nightclub, simultaneously filling my pockets with cash and completely killing my social life (a good trade-off?). Here’s the thing about nightclub life: it very quickly becomes your life, and soon you find yourself lost when you actually have a night off and time to exist outside of the bartending-cocktail waitressing-door managing continuum. I typically only function during the times when most people are (hopefully) asleep in their nice cozy beds.
Which leads me to the other thing about nightclub life (AKA the reason I’m writing about this right now): it’s fucking hysterical. I attend Rutgers Review meetings brimming with stories about the man who lost his credit card, the woman who fell ass-first through the door frame, the dance-off between tiny white women and their equally-tiny Indian counterparts. I’m still new at this, just recently the recipient of the ever-so-important bartending license (which allows me VIP access through the gated entrance toward what we lovingly call “the service industry”), but if I’m already this full of excellent stories, I’m pretty sure I can write a kick-ass book in a few years time. I’m not sure I can ever let myself quit the industry despite the insufferable people you have to deal with, for the sake of constant weekend entertainment between the hours of 8 pm and 3 am.
So consider this your intro into what will become a column of sorts, detailing the greatest phenomena that occurs in the New Brunswick 21+ club scene. This is bound to be a super exciting time. Strap on your drinking boots and get ready for the ride.
Anonymous for the sake of keeping a job
You may be in denial, but school starts this week. It’s almost time to wake up and smell the ABP coffee before we run into our morning classes. But if you’re like me you may not be entirely ready for summer to be over and I have just the thing for you: a Dark and Stormy.
A high school friend of mine heralded it as “the PERFECT summer drink.” I have very specific ideas when it comes to perfection in a glass during the summer… and all of them involve fruit. Seeing as Dark and Stormys consist of ginger beer and rum, I had my doubts.
I rounded up the ingredients and sat down for a taste test with my housemate, whose favorite drink happens to be the Dark and Stormy. So, folks, from my own skeptical self and an aficionado, this is the winning recipe:
In a medium sized glass, pour
-1 ounce Kraken black spiced rum
-a few ice cubes
-juice of ½ lime
-a handful of blackberries, muddled
-Fentimans Ginger Beer to fill glass
You don’t have to use these brands, but those are the ones I used with excellent results. Fentimans is great in general; I have used their Rose Lemonade as a mixer before and trust them to make products that actually taste like what they claim to be. Their Ginger Beer tastes like actual ginger (read: tart and spicy). Mixed with the spiced rum, this is a drink that explodes on the tongue with thunderous flavor.
Blackberries are not a part of the classic Dark and Stormy, but I found them an apt flavor compliment, softening the sharp-tasting ginger. Plus, you’ll have a juicy snack waiting for you at the bottom of your glass.
So prolong your summer with a Dark and Stormy: the official drink of the summer storm.
By Leena Shah
Waves crashing, in cadence to one’s footsteps
So virginal, yet they possess a certain mystical trait
Oh, so tempting to an innocent soul,
That its seductiveness allures a man into the sea
And so, he is an incompetent being
His body glides into the salt water,
Like a hawk’s wings gliding through the sky
While his toes try to grip onto the wet sand
And the lifeguard chair gets smaller in the distance
At last, the ocean has captured him as its prey
Soon his mind drifts away in tranquility,
As thoughts of his divorce and his precarious job
Become erased from his mind like his anniversary date
He gives himself entirely to the blue so that,
When a ferocious wave approaches him,
And prepares to attack, as if in a battle
He thinks he’s being carried into safe arms
But, instead, the wave swallows him in one monstrous chomp
He falls hard to the ground and his vision goes black
Inside, vivid pictures raid his mind,
While a robust vacuum sucks his existence
Like the dust from underneath his shabby couch
Water pours into his lungs, burning them below
While his hands flop in desperation above
At this moment, the lifeguard is conveniently asleep
And people too busy chatting to see him
It is all over now; he is gone.
The sea patiently anticipates another victim,
To rejuvenate and start its vicious cycle anew
Today it has someone in mind
Hope to see you soon.
I can’t find any clean underwear. If I’m going to be in a surgical gown, I need to make sure I’m wearing clean underwear with no holes. Not a thong though, and not boy shorts because they ride up. Not a pair with lace. Maybe an all-cotton blend. What’s classy for medical procedures? I don’t want to seem promiscuous when I get put under anesthesia to get a large tube shoved down my throat. I regret never buying matching bra and underwear sets.
Tomorrow morning I’m getting an upper-level endoscopy. This means that a doctor is going to knock me out, stick a tube with a camera down my esophagus and into my stomach, and look around a bit. While he’s in the neighborhood he’s going to take a few biopsies of my stomach tissue. This scavenger hunt of my insides is supposed to find the solution to the question “Why am I always vomiting?”
Being sick is something I’m becoming used to. I can’t sleep sometimes because my throat is pushing up all the food I tried to swallow earlier. Hardly anything stays in my body for more than a few hours. I miss eggs and bacon, turkey sandwiches, soup, ice cream. I miss going out to lunch with my friends. Sometimes when I’m in the car, I need to pull over to vomit. I’ve developed a bizarre envy/hate relationship regarding every person who’s ever won an eating contest. Eating one sandwich is too much of a challenge.
This test is supposed to find some possible diagnoses. Maybe it’s a chemical imbalance or maybe I’m allergic to wheat. Maybe I just need a few pills and I’ll be fine. It could be something so small that I’d fix it right away. But it could also be something bad. It could be that this problem I’ve developed in the last eight months will continue to worsen every day until I can’t do the things I want to anymore. Which is exactly what I’m afraid of it being. My greatest fear is stopping what I’m doing before I’ve done anything worth being proud of. Being considered worthless. Useless. The only thing I’m trying to run away from is inside of me.
To prepare for my procedure I keep telling myself to pretend to be brave until I become brave. The plan for tomorrow morning is to get up at 6:45 AM and drive to the hospital. Change into my gown, get an IV, and force myself to be brave. Two hours later I should have some pictures of my stomach and maybe an idea of why it isn’t working.
Hopefully I’ll be wearing a clean pair of underwear.
-Sarah Beth Kaye
By Caleb Rechten
I write a lot. And when you’re writing, or rather, when ‘I’ am writing, I need to have some form of music playing. It helps me focused and inspires me. If I don’t have something playing I am either interrupted by my family (I have three younger sisters who are very excellent at the interrupting of focus) or the conversations of Starbucks patrons.
It took a while, but I finally honed in on the best type of music to listen to while writing: video game music. Thanks to my extensive self proclaimed nerdom, I had no trouble in finding a decent amount of music just for such a purpose as writing. There are several reasons behind video game music being the best for writing or any focus intensive task. One, video game music is usually instrumental. So, just like Mozart, Bach, and Chopin, there are no words (except for any operas of course). Words are usually fairly distracting in my experience because it’s something I have to consciously pay attention to. And I have a difficult time not focusing on that in place of my work. It’s nearly as bad as listening to the conversations in Starbucks.
Something else to consider is how classical music helps brain activity and development. So what better music to listen to than classical, video game, or movie scores?
I would say video game music and movie scores are where most of the modern classical composers are. Hans Zimmer, who composed the music for Sherlock Holmes, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Gladiator among many other compositions, is my prime example of a modern day classical composer and I bow to him. Danny Elfman is a favorite as well. Both composers have dabbled in creating music for video games like Call of Duty, Crysis 2, Fable One and Two, and video game spin offs of their movie counterparts like Batman.
Simply put, the reason video game music is so excellent for focus oriented tasks is because it’s geared to specifically be in the background. Because of this I’d say it’s a half or quarter step in front of movie scores. Movie scores are meant to be in the background as well, but unlike video game music, you aren’t meant to hear the same repetitive music hour upon hour upon hour. There’s always some music that will have a bad composer, made for a part of the game you only hear for a few minutes and would wind up being a terrible example of what I’m describing, but the majority of it is exactly as I described.
Some music and composers I’d recommend to you would include:
Anything composed by Nobuo Uematsu, the writer of the most popular music from Final Fantasy games, Music from Castlevania, Crono Trigger and Crono Cross, World of Warcraft, Kingdom Hearts, and many others. If you’re already familiar with Nobuo Uematsu’s music from Final Fantasy, I’d recommend you check out his work on the video game music for Blue Dragon which is nearly as impressive. There’s also a good album of video game music entitled ‘Video Games Live’ that has many of the video game music I’ve mentioned and more.